A few words from Anaelor

[scarylullabiez]

My rat, Faustus, has finally discovered how to use the wheel in his cage. This is wonderful, because I know that if he is in his cage he can get excersise. But, he mostly uses it at night, and the wheel squeeks like a mofo. So it kept me up all night long. >_< (Note to self: Buy WD-40)

A crazy fellow came into my work this morning. He was spouting things about our eyes being pearls...and how we are spinning around a mountain(?). He started talking to my only other customers. They were tourists from...Holland I think. They were totally into it. I was just kind of weirded out and annoyed, because I was trying to clean, and he was following me around.

I helped Mateo house-sit this drummers house out here for a few days. It was pretty fun. The guy had two big Boxers who enjoyed chewing on my arms, eating my bras, and sticking their faces in my crotch. Oh the joys of dogs.


Mateo(drunk): Dogs are so much better than kids. When we get married, can we have dogs instead of kids?
Me(sober): Sure. As long as you don't care that you're not the father.
Mateo: Sweet!

Mateo: I just leveled up! (he was playing Diablo)
Me: Was it good for you?
Mateo: *orgasm noises*

Me: Are you hungry?
Mateo: Yes...
Me: Do you want me to go get something to eat? Since you won't leave the house...
Mateo: You can leave if you want...I feel bad, I'm just playing video games. You must be bored...
Me: No, I meant, I'll go get some food and bring it back here...
Mateo: You're going to leave and not come back!
Me: No. I'm going to go get food...
Mateo: Right...
Me: I'm leaving now...

Mateo: *is digging through my purse*
Me: What are you doing?
Mateo: *pulls out chocker with bell on it* I like when you wear this.
Me: Huh?
Mateo: Specially when we have sex. I like it when you jingle. It's like...a little added plus.
Me: O_o

Katy J (during a short trip to the Bowl): I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TOUCH A PENIS!
Alabama George: No woman does. All that matters is that you end up with it in your mouth.
Katy J: But...sometimes the guy like puts my hand on his dick and I am like "OMG WHAT DO I DO NOW??"
Me: I think they just want you to know that it's there.
Mateo: Stroke it a bit maybe...
Alabama George: PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH!
All: O_O

Mateo: *working on flier for PlaneView concert* I don't know how to make this text stand out on the background... >_<
Me: *leans over, fixes, sits back* There.
Mateo: You are brilliant!


GETTING INTERNET HOOKED UP AT THE HOUSE TOMARROW!!! *waves arms around dramatically*

My bosses dad came by. He greeted me with "Good Morning Sun Worshipper."

Comments

[bd-love.livejournal.com]

My snake used to try to escape at night. So it would constantly make this tapping sound because it was feeling around the top of the screen with it's nose.

Although it was a lot less annoying than a squeak.

[scary-lullabies.livejournal.com]

OMGOMGOMG! INTERNETS TODAY!! I'm with Alabama George. Yum. *licks lips*

[scary-lullabies.livejournal.com]

I think you would like Alabama George. He is like...a long haired bow-twang that makes some mean grits. Or something.